references galore is what i should be cruising-or better suited term is surfing for. but i thought i'd drop in and write a bit. its 2.30pm. i have 6 hours before i have,..no-wait 5 hours before i have to leave for my my on-call shift at the neuro dept. for the next 24hrs. ahh. i can hardly wait.
sure, i would like to share the few experiences, funny 7 sad moments all rolled up in one day under 15 minutes of life changing actions. it's a great tribulation of feelings when you come in to see a patient whom had attack of stroke, unable to move, speak or even open his eyes..just look at you, smile his/ her crooked smile and say "Thank you."
Of course, i wasn't the dr. that treated or signed his prescriptions..but i was the junior doctor that accepted him/her and his/her family when they first came.
The rest of the days aren't as great..after a while you get stuck in a rut of routine work that you have no identifiable feelings for some patients. or so i hear my residents say...its dissapointing. thinking if you'd turn out like that.
Okay. i'm getting lost in translation already.
work is never done.
Untill then,
Dee
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Putting on a smile everyday is tiring.
Telling everyone you’re fine and dandy when you have no idea how you are – even worse.
So how do I fix it? Am I depressed? Seriously?
Why.?
I have so much going for me, things that some people can only dream of. But why am I not HAPPY?
Yes. I get lonely. I live in a house alone. I eat by myself. I study on my own. And watch dvd’s in the comfort of my own home ALL by myself.
Don’t get me wrong. I call up the occasional friends to go out, n have fun or just ring em up to hang out when they’re free. Maybe I don’t make enough effort to socialize.
Now? It rains. No It pours, 24 hours a day and it won’t stop. Everybody’s staying in.
The house floods when I’m not around. So I stay to make sure it doesn’t happen.
Someone told me they think I’m strong.
Me? Strong? Yeah- cos I am independent, I do everything on my own. In my defense, I don’t really know whom I can call if ever I need help.
Argh.
Maybe it’s the immediate change of environment. Just 2 days back I was home, with my family and yes eventhough it was raining all day there as well; I didn’t feel this bad. I wasn’t alone.
I’m just sad,and sick.
Yep, coming down with the flu and hating it.
Damp.moldy.and cold. –that’s my address.
Dee
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