Friday 24 June 2011

A never ending cycle of stupidity

That was what my Boss, the yo-yo said about our patients decision to forgo an operation. It was an AKA operation or Above Knee Amputation. I dont find it very professional to insult someones personal right not to cut off their legs.

yes their limbs can't be saved. Yes the bacteria or flesh eating bacterias will ascend and spread if we do not. But who are we to force an action on them.

It is our duty to advice.

Working life has been shaky for me to start off with. I've been on the job for 5 weeks now and there's no satisfaction. Maybe a tiny bit.

I dont HATE my job.
I'm just still trying to find my footing in the sea of H.O's who are far more worthy and quick on their feet and mind than i am.

Everyday i wonder if i'm doing the right thing. If i know exactly what i'm doing and if i really want to do this for the rest of my life.

Orthopaedics Department is not too heavy-handed. The protocols and procedures are though. I've had 4 calls which by normal HO standard is really not much but too me, i feel like i'm struggling.

sighs.

Took a sick leave today. And could not help to think about work all day which made my sick day unenjoyable.
Had a headache and migraine, so didn't go to work.
But i had no idea not going to work and thinking about work at home could give me more headache,

I believe i care too much.

Am working on weekends too so i guess i shouldn't feel guilty.

Let's hope my mood will pick up in the next few weeks and i'll be a pro in no  time :)

2 thoughts:

Melissa said...

You'll be fine Dydee :) im sure the rest feel the same way! You'll be an excellent doc ;) hang in there love.

Dydee Alwi said...

thank u mel :) heee lama tak ber blog bulan puasa ni