Friday 1 May 2009

Strangers in the Outfield

Remember when we were growing up, how our parents would tell us,
just as they send us off to school, whether on a school bus, or driving us to the school gates themselves; they would remind us,

"Don't speak to strangers, alright?"

And' we'd nod, understanding strangers meant people you don't know personally but never fully taking into consideration what a stranger is connected with.

I consider myself a polite, educated and friendly person. And so if i do bump into a stranger, whether on the streets, on an airplane, or eating out; and they inititate a hello, i would reply with a smile or maybe another greeting.

Sure, you first have to be able to pick the situation in which to give a response. If i was feeling rather down and moody or perhaps the 'stranger' emitted some bad vibes i might just look up and decline to respond.

But as i said, being maybe a little too friendly i usually respond in a positive or affirmative sign.
I made another friend on my flight back to Makassar today. And yes, my friends raised their eyebrows when i shared the information. And so he is french, and had so much stories to tell on our 3-hour flight that i enjoyed the company. But because i learned my lesson from the scare in Christchurch, i ended the acquaintance at the airport, although i initially did offer to drop him off somewhere in town just because he seemed lost. Bad judgement call?

Now this wasn't my only 'friendly' encounter with a stranger as i had mentioned, as i have been flying on my own for the last few years all over, i do tend to make 'friends'. I met a German Pro-Skater on my flight to Christchurch, a Japanese and Kiwi couple on my flight to Melbourne, and the list goes on.

But, it was on the streets of Christchurch city that i regretted my respond to a stranger. He appeared friendly, we spoke of architecture and education as well as the history of Christchurch. But when he followed me into the Museum that i had started to sense the bad vibes.
Being an outsider, a tourist perhaps i misjudged myself thinking he was merely a friendly samaritan wanting to guide a tourist around. And when he lay his hands on me, i froze.

When it was just on my shoulder, i managed to simply shrug it off, maybe he didn't realise his hand was there? maybe this is just a normal thing over here. Then it came again and moved lower, and lower and i knew i wasn't imagining it. Alarms were ringing in my head. This isn't right. I have no idea who this guy is!

I pushed him away and ran off. I wasn't thinking right, or i would've gone to the museum guards. But i went for the bathroom instead, Washed my face. Thought it over and peered outside. he was gone. I wanted to report it to the guards but since he wasn't around i decided i didn't have to.

Of course, walking back into the city i wish i had, because who knew if he had been waiting for me outside? and he was big and tall.

Needless to say, i didnt speak to anyone else the rest of the day. And the rest of my trip, my conversations were reserved for my tour guide and tour mates. I was told off though when i got home,

'Didn't your mum ever told you not to speak to strangers?"

I could only nod in defense. Who knew?

My only advice is women, who travel on their own should always be careful of their surroundings. I never thought it would happen to me. but it did. And i am now more aware of violation than before. It isn't right.

I hope we all can learn a thing or two from my experience.

0 thoughts: